Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Dynamic Presentation Skills

Normally I don't go to corporate events in school, especially the ones that are held during the 6-8pm time slot. But on Thursday, my friend and I went to an even called Dynamic Presentation Skills hosted by Ernst and Young. The turnout wasn't so good, about thirty or so people showed up. There were a lot of empty seats around. The main topic of the event was how to improve presentation skills. The video they showed us was really informative, humorous and helpful.

Arch Lustberg (in the video) explains to us how and why we must improve our presentation skills. According to statistics, on the list of the worst human fears, fear of public speaking is on top of the list. No matter how good your information is, if your presentation skills are lacking, your audience will not pay attention to you. To be successful, one must be able to show the audience competence and likability. If you know your material, you can be confident. However, the aspect that most people mess up is likability.

Communication with the audience should focus on 4 things:
1. Mind - What you have to say; keep it simple, direct, and brief. If you are using fancy words your audience are unfamiliar with, they will not be able to follow what point you are trying to make.
2. Face - Use an open face. Your smile must be appropriate and genuine. Do not use the neutral face (boring) and the closed face (angry).
3. Body - Gestures must be appropriate and do not do the following:
a) Defensive position - do not cross your arms.
b) Royalty position - do not put your hands behind your back.
c) Hands in pockets - do not stick your hands inside your pockets.
d) Cover your crotch position - obvious information is obvious.
4. Voice - Not too loud, not too soft, not too fast, etc.

I should probably throw myself out there more often.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Another Virus

That's right, another virus self installed on my desktop.

Last night, a stupid malware forced its way through my computer and self installed on my computer. This isn’t the first time, but it was some weak garbage the last time it happened. This time, the malware deleted my Malware Bytes and disabled my antivirus. It even locked down my task manager so I wasn’t able to end the program. It was a very serious thing. Luckily I had my laptop and was able to research the damn thing. The name of the malware is called “Security Tools.” It is a genius name to dub a virus because the name is so generic; the search results don’t come up as solutions to a virus. After spending two hours past my usual bedtime, I decided to leave it till today. “Security Tools” is a rogue antivirus program that says your computer is infected with fake viruses when in fact, it is the virus itself. It doesn’t allow you to do anything, can’t run any antivirus programs at all.

After using trusty Google, I found my answer. I went into safe mode and ran MSCONFIG to disable all the startup processes, so the annoying virus wouldn’t start on startup. Next, I ran REGEDIT and deleted the registry with the folder with the virus. Since Malware Bytes was still down, I tried to reinstall it. No such luck I’m afraid. Somehow the virus managed is programmed to auto delete the .EXE file of MBAM. I got around it by installing an updated version onto an USB drive and ran a scan and removed the virus. However, it was still messed up because when I rebooted, I still got error messages. Since “Security Tools” was gone, I can run my Avira, and so I ran a scan with that. After that, I still couldn’t install MBAM regularly. I installed Spybot Search and Destroy, and ran yet another scan. Finally, it got rid of everything. This was quite an annoying virus indeed.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

I would prefer not to.

For the end of our alienation section, we read an epic short story written by the author of Moby Dick, Herman Melville. The title is Bartleby the Scrivener. I don't think you will look up what the story is about so here's the Wikipedia plot summary:


"The narrator, an elderly lawyer who has a very comfortable business helping wealthy men deal with mortgages, title deeds, and bonds, relates the story of the strangest man he has ever known.

The narrator already employs two scriveners, Nippers and Turkey. Nippers suffers from chronic indigestion, and Turkey is a drunk, but the office survives because in the mornings Turkey is sober even though Nippers is irritable, and in the afternoons Nippers has calmed down even though Turkey is drunk. Ginger Nut, the office boy, gets his name from the little cakes he brings the older men. Bartleby arrives in answer to an ad for another scrivener, and the narrator hires the forlorn-looking young man in hopes that his calmness will soothe the temperaments of the others.

One day, when asked by the narrator to help proofread a copied document, Bartleby answers with what soon becomes his stock response: "I would prefer not to." To the dismay of the narrator and to the irritation of the other employees, Bartleby performs fewer and fewer tasks around the office. The narrator makes several attempts to reason with him and to learn something about him, but Bartleby offers nothing but his signature "I would prefer not to." One weekend the narrator stops by the office unexpectedly and discovers that Bartleby has started living there. The loneliness of Bartleby's life impresses him: At night and on Sundays, Wall Street is as desolate as a ghost town. The narrator's feelings for Bartleby alternate between pity and revulsion.

For a while Bartleby remains willing to do his main work of scrivening, but eventually he "prefers not to" do this as well, so that finally he is doing nothing. And yet the narrator finds himself unable to make Bartleby leave; his unwillingness or inability to move against Bartleby mirrors Bartleby's own strange inaction. Tension gradually builds as the narrator's business associates wonder why the strange and idle Bartleby is ever-present in the office.

Sensing the threat of a ruined reputation, but emotionally unable to throw Bartleby out, the exasperated narrator finally decides to move out himself, relocating his entire business and leaving Bartleby behind. But soon the new tenants of the old space come to ask for his help: Bartleby still will not leave. Although they have thrown him out of the rooms, he continues to haunt the hallways. The narrator visits Bartleby and attempts to reason with him. Feeling desperate, the narrator now surprises even himself by inviting Bartleby to come and live with him at his own home. But Bartleby, alas, "prefers not to."

Deciding to stay away from work for the next few days for fear he will become embroiled in the new tenants' campaign to evict Bartleby, the narrator returns to find that Bartleby has been forcibly removed and imprisoned. The narrator visits him, finding him even glummer than usual. As ever, Bartleby rebuffs the narrator's friendliness. Nevertheless, the narrator bribes a turnkey to make sure Bartleby gets good and plentiful food. But when the narrator visits again a few days later, he discovers Bartleby newly dead. Bartleby, who had "preferred not to" eat, has starved.

Some time afterward, the narrator hears of a rumor to the effect that Bartleby had worked in a dead letter office, but had lost his job there. The narrator reflects that the dead letters would have made anyone of Bartleby's temperament sink into an even darker gloom. Dead letters are emblems of our mortality and of the failures of our best intentions. Through Bartleby, the narrator has glimpsed the world as the miserable scrivener must have seen it. The closing
words of the story are the narrator's resigned and pained sigh: "Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"


This was a very funny story, I couldn't help but laugh out loud as I was reading. The main character, Bartleby, seemed so serious about not wanting to do anything that it seemed unrealistic that something like this can happen in real life. The content itself was nothing to be laughed about, alienation is no laughing matter, I assure you. It was the way the story was told, the way the narrator spoke that made the story comical. When asked if Bartleby would go to the post office, he replied, "I would prefer not to." When asked if he could behave reasonably, "I would prefer not to behave reasonably," said he. In fact, this was his reply to everything, including food. Little by little, Bartleby walls himself from life and thus dies. What can I take away from this story? Aside from the laughs, a more serious lesson is to be learned. However, I can't quite put it in words so I'll leave it up to your imagination.


What is our next topic? Love and its counterfeits.

More Anticipation

Today was supposedly the accounting midterm. I prepared for it thoroughly and was ready to take it. Things don't always go my way, in fact it rarely does. Just when I thought I was ready to take the test, the professor came into the class late, told us she didn't have the test papers. Some "technical difficulties" made her unable to access the exam papers. By the time she got them, 20 minutes had already passed, so the midterm is postponed until Thursday. I wanted to take it today, to get it over with, oh well. Since we didn't have the test, she decided to teach. When that was said, well over 60% of the class left the lecture hall. She was shocked and I felt sorry for her. It seems to me that the only reason why these people come to class is for attendance purposes. Since they don't take attendance on exam days, people just leave. I suppose you can keep the body in the lecture hall but most of them dose off or turn off their brains anyway.


Blog Funny:

Monday, October 12, 2009

TL;DR

I've noticed my latest posts have been way too long, who wants to read all that right?

Anyway today's subject matter is that there is a wretched stench in the entire apartment building. I think the new neighbors downstairs are substance users, so things might get more shady. I wonder how living in a building with fumes of pot will affect my brain.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

The Book

The book came in today. I immediately began reading it, despite the fact that I have other homework to do.

Some really good quotes from the book:

"I can help you to accept and open yourself mostly by accepting and revealing myself to you."

"But, if I tell you who I am, you may not like who I am and it is all that I have."

"I can only know that much of myself which I have had the courage to confide to you."

"The greatest kindness I have to offer you is always: the truth."

"To refuse the invitation to interpersonal encounter is to be an isolated dot in the center of a great circle--a small island in a vast ocean."

"To reveal myself openly and honestly takes the rawest kind of courage."

"It is a law of human life, as certain as gravity; to live fully, we must learn to use things and love people... not love things and use people."



I'm halfway done with the book--it's a short book--and I have reflected upon a lot of the things Powell has said. Powell describes five levels of communication, a very fascinating phenomenon that after some thought, is applicable to the people I meet daily. I'm not going to type out the exact text so I'm simply going to summarize.

Level 5 - Cliche Conversation
The weakest response in human interaction in which there is no communication at all. "How are you?" "It's really good to see you." We talk in cliches and we mean almost nothing of what we say. If we get a really thought out answer to the question, how are you? in detail, we would be astounded. Usually, we don't bother and give the simple, "Fine, thank you."

Level 4 - Reporting the Facts about Others
We remain content on restating facts on what others have done or said. We offer no personal reflection on these facts. We simply report them, we give nothing of ourselves and invite nothing from others in return.

Level 3 - My Ideas and Judgments
There is some communication of my person. I will take the risk of telling you some of my ideas and reveal some of my judgments. My words are carefully thought out, I will carefully watch how you react. I want to be sure that you will accept me with my ideas, judgments, and decisions. If you appear bored, uninterested, disgusted, I will retreat to safer ground--change the subject, or worse, I will start to say things I suspect that you want me to say.

Level 2 - My Feelings (emotions)
The thing that most clearly differentiate and individuate me from others, that make the communication of my person a unique knowledge, are my feelings or emotions. The feelings that lie under my ideas, judgments and convictions are uniquely mine.

Level 1 - Peak Communication
(Can't really be summarized because I do not truly understand it).

Wonder if I'll ever be able to accomplish level 1.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Why Am I Afraid to Show You Who I Am?

The following post will be a very long one, I believe most of you will forgo it. It talks about a lot of things I relate to and has a very important meaning for me. But if you appreciate thinking about life, go on and read what I have to say.

"Why am I afraid to show you who I am?" by John Powell.

A two page excerpt from English class:


Someone has aptly distinguished five levels of communication on which persons can relate to one another. Perhaps it will help our understanding of these levels to visualize a person locked inside of a prison. The prisoner in our example is a man, but he represents every human being. He is urged by an inner insistence to go out to others and yet afraid to do so. The five levels of communication, which will be described a little latter, represent five degrees of willingness to go outside of the self, to communicate the self to others.

The main in the prison—and he is everyone—has been there for years, although ironically the grated iron doors are not locked. He can go out of his prison, but in his long detention he has learned to fear the possible dangers that he might encounter. He has come to feel some sort of safety and protection behind the walls of his prison, where he is a voluntary captive. The darkness of his prison shields him from a clear view of himself. He is not sure what he would look like in broad daylight. Above all, he is not sure how the world, which he seems from behind the bars, and the people whom he sees moving about in that world, would receive him. He is fragmented by an almost desperate need for that world and for those people and at the same time, by an almost desperate fear of the risks of rejection he would be taking if he ended his isolation.

This prisoner is reminiscent of what Viktor Frankl writes, in his book Man's Search for Meaning, about his fellow prisoners in the Nazi concentration camp at Dachau. These prisoners yearned desperately for their freedom. Yet some of them had been held captive so long that when they were eventually released, they walked out into the sunlight, blinked nervously, and then silently walked back into the familiar darkness of the prison. They had been accustomed to this darkness for such a long time.

This is visualized, if somewhat dramatic, dilemma that all of us experience at some time in our lives and in the process of becoming persons. Most of us make only a weak response to the invitation of encounter with others and our world because we feel uncomfortable in exposing our nakedness as persons. Some of us are willing only to pretend this exodus, while others somehow find in themselves the courage to go all the way out to freedom....



This is what I have to say:

Alienation is wall building, to protect ourselves from getting hurt. Sometimes this process is invisible to the builder; it disconnects the builder from others, him/herself, and purpose in life. Why do people build walls? They are afraid of what others think. We all want to be loved, as human beings, and being liked is the step down from it. Most of the time we take what others think a bit too much.

We are afraid of rejection, "Oh is that what you think? I don't think I like you." This is why people conform to norms. To deviate from the norm is to stand out as weird, and people have a natural tendency to conform to what others are doing. Who are you really? Is it who you want to be? Or is it who others want you to be?

Why am I afraid to tell you who I really am? I'm afraid to tell you who I really am because if I tell you who I am, you might not like who I am--and that's all I've got. Because really, what else do I have to offer if you don't like me for who I am? It is for this very reason that most people shield themselves against the world, choosing to reveal what part they deem "safe" to show others.

I guess this is why I am such a cynic in general. I once revealed to this person who I really am, the truth, and tore down the walls. "To reveal myself openly and honestly takes the rawest kind of courage," as John Powell would put it. And you know what? When it didn't work out, the feeling of rejection was very overwhelming. After that, I rebuilt my invisible wall once again, feeling unsafe, crawling back into my cave. I'm afraid to open up again, only to get let down. But you know what, if the person doesn't like you for who you are, then it isn't the right person. Relationships have to be mutual, or else it’s a sham.

I ordered the book just now, on Barnes and Noble for $6 (the book costs $2). I hope I'll learn more about myself and if not, at least get some good insights for life. So far it seems like such a fascinating topic...


Blog funny:

Sunday, October 4, 2009

A New Chapter Begins

Since I like my English class so much, I'm going to dedicate this entire post on what's going on in that class. Our last topic was evil human nature, narcissism, violence and murder. All of that sums up to the dark half of human nature. If people weren't so selfish, thinking only of I Me Mine all the time, the world will be a very different place.

Ex:
I want your brand new Jordans. I'm going to cut you if you don't hand them over.
But you love me, how can you do this to me?


I Me Mine Lyrics--by the Beatles

All thru' the day I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
All thru' the night I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
Now they're frightened of leaving it
Ev'ryone's weaving it,
Coming on strong all the time,
All thru' the day I me mine.

I-I-me-me mine,
I-I-me-me mine,

All I can hear I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
Even those tears I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
No-one's frightened of playing it
Ev'ryone's saying it,
Flowing more freely than wine,
All thru' Your life, I me mine.

I-I-me-me mine,
I-I-me-me mine,

All I can hear I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
Even those tears I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
No-one's frightened of playing it
Ev'ryone's saying it,
Flowing more freely than wine,
All thru' your life I me mine.


You get the point. Everyone's out to look out for themselves. Remember other people are people too, the world doesn't revolve around you or me, but for everyone. Take for example all of those dictators that killed millions of people for their enjoyment (Hitler). Was he mentally unstable? No, he was well aware of what he was doing, but his narcissism, his disregard for other human beings led him to do very evil deeds. Just remember this world will be a better place if we all loved ourselves a bit less and put others a bit higher.


Our next topic will be a very universal feeling that everyone comes across sometime in their lifetime--alienation.